Sunday, January 28, 2007

ADDITIONAL SUNDAY READING (read I am really bored today!)

Apparently it only takes two people to have an AA meeting, and since I am here with me, myself and I , guess that fits the criteria! It is customary to open the meeting with a moment of silence followed by the serenity prayer , may I have that moment now please...

Grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change (you, the weather, Devilteen...)
The courage to change the things I can (me, my thoughts, my behaviors...)
and the wisdom to know the difference...

DOH (slaps forehead!!!) I was doing so well there for a brief moment...
Hey there! My name is Lushgurl, and I AM an alcoholic! Welcome to my Sunday night ramblings and now to qualify...the very fact that I would find a loophole in order to make my own meeting should qualify me...You see I feel a little guilty that I made absolutely no attempt to hit a meeting this weekend. I don't even have a plausible excuse to cover my ass, nor do I have a reason. I just didn't go. The good news/bad news is...I actually do feel guilty. I could have made the effort, I know I would have heard something I needed to hear. I know I would have seen at least one friend who probably would have hugged me. So what did I do ? Yup, stayed home all by self, although I didn't have a pity party, and I did stalk many sober peoples' Blogs, I still feel the need to 'should' on myself...

I slept a lot this weekend, that was not too bad as I have not been feeling very well. I finished some housework that I had started so I would not feel like a total loser. I even picked up the phone and called a couple of friends. The whole weekend was not a write off. I did do things to take care of me, but man, first AA f--s up my drinking and now, it is f--ing my ability to wallow in misery too!!! What does a gurl hafta do to indulge in a good ol' fashioned pity party anyway? If the answer is DRINK or USE... Been there done that etc. and (never ceases to amaze me) I don't want to use today. Despite my best efforts to stay the same, all of the meetings I have been attending are starting to rub off into my daily affairs. THEY told me this would happen. THEY said the Promises would come true. THEY said "Keep coming Back". even if my ass is not at a meeting it seems my recovery rally still works in my life!

I am so grateful today to have a place to go and write out my feelings, and in reading other recovery blogs, I find so many others who share the same struggles as I do. This weekend especially that was a comfort to me, even though I didn't actually GO anywhere YOU all have helped me to survive myself!!! OMG...I feel the need to get sappy...I just want to thank each and everyone of you who stops by to say HI! I truly feel that I am never alone. I feel very blessed that in my darkest thoughts, there is still a glimpse of light. All I have to do is open my curtains ( read open my blog) and I feel the warmth and love of recovery enveloping me. I can choose to do something different tomorrow, and that again is thanks to YOU...

On that note , I'll end this meeting with the resposibility pledge...

When anyone, anywhere
reaches out for help
I want the hand of AA always to be there
and for that I am responsible
( cyber squeezes all your hands...)



SoberSteve said...

You forgot the
I went to a meeting sunday and prayed for all cyber AA family. So you should be covered, I think.

Take care, go to meeting this week.

Jobthingy said...

thanks for the meeting. ill stay sober til the weekend. :P

Steven Novak said... all I have to do is show up and leave a comment and I'll do a good deed?


This is easy. ;)


The Maven said...

I like the gratuitous use of your three personalities to make a meeting. Quite impressive! What creative thing will she come up with next, blog fans? Stay tuned to Lushgurl's Less-than-lucid Adventures to find out!


awww it almost makes me feel like I was there thanks lushgurl for being there for the needy ;)