In my trAAvels today, someone said that they kind of wonder about the people who seem to always be positive, and lately I find that I am one of those people! The old me would have immediately questioned my own sincerity, perhaps even indulged in some stinking-thinking with a dessert of the poor-me-blues. Today though I am embracing the feelings of being positive and happy, For too many years, I waited for the other shoe to drop, and indeed, if it did not drop if its' own accord, I would take it off and throw it down like a guantlet! I challenge ye to a duel Sorrow. Misery thy name is Lushgurl. Guilt, take me as your lover. Anger, I pray to feel your wrath.... So where has this sad, lonely, angry, confused little gurl gone? WHO CARES!!! Today I feel all of my emotions, I just choose to stay with the good ones longer. I think that my experiences have taught me very well, how to ride the wave of negativity, but I'm finding I kinda like waking up bieng OK with me. And I am learning more and more, to be OK with you too. This is a BIG change for me, and the Big Book says, "Change we must"... Do any of y'all have thoughts on this today? Yeah, I know I've added that southern twang, must have picked it up in my travels, LOL.
Enjoy today's Daily Reflection with me...
AA experience has taught us that we cannot live alone with our pressing problems and character defects which cause or aggravate them. If... Step Four... has revealed in stark relief those experiences we'd rather not remember...then the need to quit living by ourselves with those tormenting ghosts of yesterday gets more urgent than ever. We have to talk to somebody about them.
Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions pg.55
Whatever is done is over. It cannot be changed. But my attitude about it can be changed through talking with those who have gone before and with sponsors. I can wish the past never was, but if I change my actions in regard to what I have done, my attitude will change. I won't have to wish the past away. I can change my feelings and attitudes, but only through my actions and the help of my fellow alcoholics.
For me this really sums it all up, and it also says in the promises "...we will not regret the past, nor wish to shut the door on it..." Today I am grateful/thankful for the following...
- That I don't regret my past anymore
- my Angel and I 'really' talked last night
- we have an extra day together this weekend due to a P.D. day at school
- my Angel is sick, and I know how to care for and comfort her
- I am a new, and excited member of HNT- thanks dAAve for the invite!
- MY boys actually broke their long losing streak yesterday- World Series here we come
- my muscles are achin', in a good way, from all of my walking and bike riding
- all three of the women who I asked to speak next month have said yes!
- for each and every one of YOU
- that I am clean and sober for another day
See ya all later, peace out...
13 comments:
Changing for the better and in a direction towards inner fulfillment is where I'm heading through the help of my program,sponsor and HP. I don't want to go back to where I was before. Not forgetting the past helps to remind me of where I've been and where I'm trying to go.
Incredible list! And you captured that feeling when our hearts expand when we rejoice in another's victory over addiction.
That change? My ex-sponser shared once that the reason Madonna has stayed so popular and successful is that she has been able to change, so he claimed that The Madonna Principle. He went on to say we have to find our inner Madonna. You should have been there, it was hilarious. But he was right on, that change is necessary for us to find sobriety and keep it.
Ride that wave of gratitude! At my first year anniversary I was on that high a month before and after.
Your positive attitude is wonderful to be around, Gurl!
You kind of cracked me up with worshipping anger and taking guilt as a lover. Sheesh. Girlfriend, we need to talk about your taste in men!
Love ya, sweetie!
XOXOX
JD
I was at the meeting where Scott's ex-sponsor shared about the Madonna Principle! It was hilarious, but also so true.
You sound great today my Lushgurl friend!
I like your gratitude lists and the thoughts about Madonna.
Yes what a listo.. happy mothers day from las vegas.
it's great to learn ho wto deal with such emotions as love, or anger, or sadness.... yay for you!
Happy Mother's Day!
Happy Mother's Day, you lush!
Oh it's so fun to be able to say that I TOO, was at the Madonna Principle meeting!!!
small small world.
I came by sweet girl to wish you a HAPPY MOTHERS DAY.
Ah. There you are! Great list.
Is that you in the baseball cap? :-D
thank you for the smiles---I could do a sorrowful duel today but I won't
Enjoy your time with Angel
how wonderful to have a chance to love her up
Lawsy, but you are so cool.
You are living deliberately and thoughtfully, and it's making all the difference. What a pleasure it is for us, your readers, to witness.
Get well soon, Angel. And happy Mother's Day, Patricia.
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