Friday, June 08, 2007


This week has been a hurry up and wait week! I am so tired, I feel out of sorts. Thank God I have my meetings and all of my blogger buds to help keep me focused on today! Tonight I will actually celebrate my B-day at my home group, there will be a medallion, and a cake, and I have chosen a speaker, but I don't know what to wear!!! And today I hear Pam say "It doesn't matter what you wear, just as long as you show up!" She has posted a week of letters to her still sick self just before finding recovery. It is painful to read, and I feel the lonliness and desperation in every word, but I have seen that miracles happen, because of who Pam is today. Please visit her here...

Here is todays Daily Reflection...

Self-searching is the means by which we bring new vision, action, and grace to bear upon the dark and negative side of our natures. With it comes the development of that kind of humility that makes it possible for us to receive God's help.... we find that bit by bit we can discard the old life- the one that did not work- for a new life that can and does work under any condition whatever.

As Bill Sees It pg.10,8

I have been given a daily reprieve contingent upon my spiritual condition provided I seek progress, not perfection. To become ready for change, I practice willingness, opening myself to possibilities of change. If I realize there are defects that hinder my usefullness in AA and toward others, I become ready by meditating and receiving direction. "some of us have tried to hold on to our old ideas and the result was nil until we let go absolutely" (Alcoholics Anonymous pg. 58) To let go and let God, I need only surrender my old ways to Him; I no longer fight nor do I try to control, but simply believe that, with God's help, I am changed and affirming this belief makes me ready. I empty myself to be full of awareness, light and love, and I am ready to face each day with hope.

I had goosebumpies typing out these last few words as I realize that the title of my post is "Running on empty"...coincidence? WE THINK NOT!!!

Today I am grateful for the following...

  • I started today out empty, and now He has filled me up!
  • to be clean and sober today
  • tonight He may use me to show a new(er)comer how it really works
  • my Angel has agreed to read the promises for us tonight
  • I get to have celebratory cake! -want some?
  • waking up at 7:30 is beginning to suck less!
  • just for today I am where I am supposed to be
  • even though I missed HNT, the party went on without me!
  • I have everything I need today, and then some
  • for each and everyone of YOU - you make my mornings worthwhile!
  • to be able to love self and others today...

Hope each and everyone finds themselves full of the good stuff today!!!


Anonymous said...

Ask G-d to give you the words and you will for sure help a newcomer tonight, girl! And probably an oldtimer, too.
You rock, Lush.
Are those your little babies on the stoop?

sharonsjourney said...

Hi Lushgurl! I haven't been able to stop by cuz I'm housesitting, & don't have access to a computer. I'm at my home for a bit, to check on my blog friends, Riley, my cat, & my flowers, can't stay for long tho. That last part of your post is beautiful, gave me goosebumps too. Yep, that's what we hope for. Good gratitude list. Thanks for your encouragement.

Am working on my 4th step, while I'm housesitting, I can devote more time on it now, that's a good thing.

Keep doing what you do, you inspire me, & others, I'm sure.

Love, Sharon

Shannon said...

It will be awesome tonight! Have fun! oh and I am sure you will look beautiful!
Thanks for filling me up on the good stuff (((HUGS)))

Syd said...

Hey there LG. Many congrats on your birthday celebration. I know that you will do just great. And all you have to do is be yourself and speak right from the heart. I don't hear much emptiness in your words but courage, hope and love.

Inmatez Wife said...

Hey Girl,

Sorry for being a stranger lately, but Im sure you know how it goes. No excuses, just telling you. Congrats to you on your birthday! Wear a smile first, the rest doesn't matter!!

Tab said...

Lushgurl..I have read so many powerful posts from people in recovery and healing from many a lifes challenges and hardships.
It is both humbling and insiring.
We all have our history..many of us have some parts we don't care to repeat.I am just grateful so many people not only find the courage to get healthy and honest with themselves but to share hope with the world as well!

Kari Sullivan said...

Happy Birthday! I'm glad you show up! And I love your pictures!!!

Peace out!

Scott said...

happy AA birthday to ya girl! Not every day is a feel good day, but at least you know what to do and you can hang in there and not destroy it all by drinking again!

God Bless, peace and hugs!

Clarity said...

Beautiful post, Gurl! Hope you have a fab celebration in a fab outfit!

Mary Christine said...

I still remember what I wore to my first meeting, my first year birthday, etc. Over twenty years ago. You will too!

Can't wait to hear all about it. It is so neat that Angel will read the promises.

Jocelyn said...

I like how you turned yourself around mid-post here and bucked up, really appreciating how amazing you are each day.

Pam said...

whoa girl...thank you for mentioning me on your post.
Last night I was laying in the bed...feeling sorry for myself, cause I had a toothache. I remembered you were out there celebrating your birthday...and it made me smile for the first time in hours...and took my mind off my tooth :)